I'm afraid. Looking at my life and the decisions I make, I typically behave out of fear. Everyone's actions are governed by some sort of rule or consequence. The two major ones, however, are fear and love. If you look at your major behaviors throughout the day, try and figure out why you behave as you do. A simple example would be that I look both ways before crossing the street out of fear that I would be hit by a car if I neglected to do so. A more complex example would be that I decide against dating a girl who's shown a lot of interest because I'm afraid it might not work. Between these two examples, a line must be drawn that decides when to stop acting out of fear and to start acting out of love.
I feel as if acting out of fear is really limiting my quality of life. Because of fear I've most likely missed out on numerous experiences and opportunities in my life, which ultimately affects how I grow as a person. This idea plagues my mind mainly because of my latest dilemma in my life; whether or not to date. I'm a 21 year old adult who has dreams and aspirations of going to grad school and furthering his career in the field he loves so much, and dating seems like the most impossible task in the world, currently. At this point in my life, the people around me also have their own dreams and aspirations and, if they hold the qualities I want in a partner, probably won't want to compromise those ideas. This makes it very difficult to find someone to be with. I start to think about my future and then theirs, and then how they may or may not coincide. And that scares me. Usually to a point where I no longer want that relationship to happen. I'm living my love life out of fear. Fear has also give me reason to date. I fear missing out on sharing my life experiences with somebody I care about. I've feared not having someone to tell my exciting news to. And I've feared not having somebody to care about what I'm doing in my life.
As I've gotten older and gone through my relationships, I've stared to fix some of these issues, but not all of them. I've now found validation through myself and my own accomplishments. And I've found that you can receive the same satisfaction of love and care from your close friends as you could a significant other. But why do I still strive to find that special someone?
Sincerely,
Your Hopeless Romantic
It's human nature to want to find that special someone. Someone who is always in your corner, who pushes you to be a better person, and who makes life interesting and exciting. That being said, I do think that finding that person you're gonna be with forever is difficult in college. Everyone is either just trying to have fun with their newfound freedom or working hard at their studies to ensure their best possible future. But that doesn't mean that dating is completely out of the question. If you find someone who is interesting and values the same things that you do, what is the harm in getting to know then more and spending time with them. Sure, things might never progress to a walk down the aisle or even anything serious for that matter. But, sometimes living in the moment and enjoying the company of others is the greatest thing there is.
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